BASED IN CLIFTON, NJ AND SERVING ALL OF NJ, NY, PA, FL, & TX
Identity & Sex Therapy for Chronic Illness, Cancer & Reproductive Health Conditions
Learning to live in a body that’s changed? You’re not alone.
Your doctors are focused on keeping you alive. They are managing your symptoms, adjusting medications, monitoring blood work, and treating the disease. But no one has really asked what it's like to live in your body now.
Maybe cancer treatment changed the way you experience touch, desire, or your reflection in the mirror. Maybe endometriosis has taught you to brace for pain before intimacy even begins. Maybe PMOS has left you feeling disconnected from your body as you navigate weight changes, acne, unwanted hair growth, infertility, or hormonal fluctuations that seem to affect every part of your identity.
Maybe PMDD has you questioning yourself every month, wondering why your emotions, relationships, and sense of self can feel so dramatically different depending on where you are in your cycle. Maybe fibroids have brought chronic bleeding, pelvic pain, surgeries, or fertility decisions you never expected to face. Maybe low testosterone has quietly changed your energy, confidence, desire, or sense of masculinity. Or perhaps you're living with diabetes, an autoimmune condition, chronic pain, cardiovascular disease, multiple sclerosis, or another long-term illness that has slowly reshaped how you move through the world.
The Invisible Weight of "Staying Positive"
People often tell you to "stay positive," to be grateful, and to focus on your health. But privately, you're grieving the body you trusted, the spontaneity you miss, and the sexuality that feels entirely different now.
You are left navigating a relationship with yourself that no longer feels familiar—one that is utterly riddled with decision fatigue and an increased mental load focused entirely on the daily mechanics of getting through the day.
At The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy, we work with adults navigating the emotional and relational impact of chronic illness, reproductive health conditions, cancer, disability, hormonal changes, and medical recovery. This is specialized therapy for people learning to live in a body that has changed—and wondering how to feel like themselves again.
It’s ok to not be ok.
For many people, chronic illness doesn't just affect physical health, it changes your very idea of wellness.
You may notice yourself moving through daily life differently.
Things that once felt effortless now require planning, energy, or emotional preparation:
Intimacy reduced to a clinical task: Feeling like any sense of natural spontaneity has completely vanished—replaced by calendar tracking, injections, and medical timelines.
A profound betrayal of intuition: Struggling to trust your body’s signals, because your physical systems have left you feeling unsafe or blindsided in the past.
The mirror as a site of mourning: Looking at your own reflection and seeing a physical form that feels unfamiliar, altered by illness, or heavy with grief.
The isolation of a hidden burden: Carrying your diagnosis as a secret, completely unsure of how to talk openly about what you are enduring without feeling like a burden.
The quiet erosion of erotic selfhood: Watching your sexual confidence drain away, replaced by an exhausting, constant self-monitoring during closeness.
Bracing for a fragile horizon: Feeling too paralyzed by medical uncertainty or identity loss to confidently imagine your future without an undercurrent of fear.
The excruciating friction of vulnerability: Finding it nearly impossible to let your guard down and simply allow yourself to receive care or tenderness from others.
You may find yourself wondering:
"Will I ever feel like myself again?"
"How do I explain what's happening to my partner?"
"Why do I feel guilty that my body can't do what it used to?"
"Can I still have a fulfilling sex life?"
"Who am I now that my body has changed?"
Sometimes the losses are visible: Hair loss. Surgical scars. Mobility changes. Weight fluctuations. Medical devices.
Sometimes they're invisible: Fatigue. Hormonal shifts. Pelvic pain. Nerve pain. Infertility. Brain fog. Loss of desire. The fear that your body has become unpredictable.
Many people describe living with a constant awareness that their body now requires negotiation instead of trust.
That experience can feel incredibly lonely.
Especially if others only see that you're "doing well."
You may be navigating:
Cancer diagnosis, treatment, survivorship, or recurrence
Endometriosis, adenomyosis, fibroids, or chronic pelvic pain
Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and its impact on body image, fertility, and identity
Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and cyclical changes in mood, relationships, and self-understanding
Low testosterone or other hormonal conditions affecting sexuality, mood, or identity
Infertility or reproductive health concerns
Diabetes and the impact of chronic illness on intimacy and sexual functioning
Autoimmune conditions, chronic fatigue, or invisible illnesses
Cardiovascular disease and changes in sexual confidence or physical capacity
Chronic pain, disability, or medical recovery after surgery
A growing sense that your body no longer feels like home
These experiences often involve ambiguous loss.
You're grieving a body that is still here—but no longer functions, feels, or responds in the ways it once did.
Many people begin blaming themselves:
"I should be handling this better."
“I should be grateful that things aren’t worse.”
"Maybe I'm just not trying hard enough."
"I don't recognize myself anymore."
But these experiences are not failures of resilience. They are deeply human responses to profound change.
Illness often changes far more than your health. It can change your identity.
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Specialized, affirming support to help you reclaim your sexual side. Whether you are navigating sexual dysfunction, low desire, or pain during sex, therapy offers a safe space to rebuild connection, confidence, and pleasure. We provide expert, identity-informed care to help you move past sexual shame, address intimacy concerns, navigate LGBTQIA+ stress, or safely explore your sexual identity.
Bespoke, expert-level care for the sexual complexities, disorders, dynamics, and desires we rarely name:
Sexual Desire & Functioning: Working through low desire, arousal or orgasm challenges, and pain during sex.
Hormonal & Reproductive Health: Navigating chronic illness, cancer, perimenopause, menopause, and complex reproductive conditions like PCOS, PMDD, endometriosis, and fibroids.
Medical & Diagnostic Anxiety: Support through difficult test results, health screenings, medical trauma, and reclaiming sexual health after surgery or major illness.
Compulsive Behaviors & Trauma: Specialized care for compulsive sexual behaviors, problematic pornography use, deep-seated shame, and healing from religious or spiritual sexual trauma.
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Reclaiming Confidence, Pleasure, and Personal Authenticity
Major life, health, or cultural changes—like becoming a parent, menopause, chronic illness, surgery, coming out, divorce, or empty nesting—can shift your sense of self and how you connect with others. We support clients in navigating these complex transitions to reclaim confidence, pleasure, and personal authenticity.
Rather than viewing these changes as isolated physical symptoms, our practice addresses how medical shifts, hormonal evolutions, and lifestyle milestones transform your internal identity and your intimate relationships.
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Reclaiming comfort, confidence, and connection when your relationship with yourself or your identity shifts. Body changes, self-consciousness, or shame can quietly undermine sexual confidence, desire, and enjoyment—profoundly affecting intimacy and overall satisfaction.
Up to 95% of LGBTQ individuals, 90% of women, and 40% of men report body dissatisfaction, which can lead to “spectatoring” during sex, lowering desire and making arousal or orgasm harder. We help you feel at home in your body, restore intimate connection, and cultivate confidence in your sexuality and identity on your own terms.
Bespoke, expert-level care for the identity shifts, relational dynamics, and somatic challenges we rarely name:
Somatic Health & Body Sovereignty: Specialized care for body image, disordered eating, trauma, identity-based harm, and healing from profound experiences of erasure.
Neurodivergence & Gender Expansion: Affirming, expert-level support for neurodivergence and sexuality (ADHD, AuDHD, ASD), alongside gender-affirming care for LGBTQ+ identity and coming out.
Relational Dynamics & Modern Intimacy: Navigating caregiver stress, burnout, dating, modern relationships, sex work, and queer-spectrum sports psychology.
Culture, Identity, & Family Evolution: Thoughtful support for expat, immigrant, and multicultural identities, as well as parenthood decisions, child-free living, and complex family planning.
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Holding space for the silent, complicated, and invisible heartbreaks traditional talk therapy overlooks. When grief intersects with reproductive choices, body changes, or identity shifts, the pain can feel deeply isolating. We provide an advanced, gentle clinical environment to help you process profound life losses, honor your unique timeline, and safely carry your grief without being forced to rush through it.
Bespoke, expert-level care for the reproductive losses, life transitions, and hidden grief we rarely name:
Reproductive Loss & Processing: Specialized support navigating the unique emotional weight of abortion, miscarriage, infertility, and the complex medical cycles of IVF.
Birthing Trauma & Postpartum Healing: Compassionate care for pregnancy complications, birth trauma, maternal mental health, matrescence, parenthood, and navigating sex after birth.
Grief, Loss, & Bereavement: Dedicated space to process the death of a loved one, secondary losses, and navigating life after major relational or family changes.
Aging & Maturation Identity Shifts: Honoring the complex grief tied to the passage of time, bodily changes, perimenopause/menopause, or outgrowing a version of yourself that once felt familiar.
Here’s how we can help:
Hello,
You can find your way back yourself, even after everything changes. You are not broken. You are becoming. Every part of you is welcome here.
I founded this practice to walk with people through the "in-between"—those profound moments when a shift in your identity, sexuality, body, or relationships means you cannot go back to how things used to feel. We specialize in that exact space where your language hasn't yet caught up to your experience, but you know you have fundamentally changed.
As a feminist healthcare provider, I believe your sexuality is entirely inseparable from your identity. This mission is to help you reclaim the parts of yourself that have been silenced, shamed, or left behind by life transitions, illness, trauma, and cultural expectations.
I built this practice to offer rare, expert-level care rooted in the exact AASECT-certified sex therapy standards and clinical social work principles I have practiced throughout my career. Using my signature ALIGN Framework and my EMPOWER Your Sexual Health® curriculum, the practice combines evidence-based sex therapy with somatic, humanistic, and meaning-centered approaches to reconnect you with your desire, identity, and sense of self.
The practice’s style is warm, collaborative, and thoughtfully direct. Let’s make space for the complexity of your experience and build a life that feels aligned, embodied, and authentically your own.
Warmly,
Genevieve Marie Gellert, MSW, LCSW, CST (she/her)
Founder, The Center for Identity and Sex Therapy
How identity & sex therapy can help you…
Therapy offers space to reconnect with yourself—not by fighting your body, but by learning to live alongside it differently.
Process the grief, identity shifts, and ambiguous losses that often accompany chronic illness, cancer, hormonal conditions, and medical recovery.
Navigate changes in body image, sexuality, intimacy, fertility, and relationships with greater compassion and clarity.
Improve communication with partners around desire, pain, caregiving, changing roles, and emotional needs.
Rebuild a relationship with your body based on trust, self-understanding, and realistic hope rather than shame or self-criticism.
At The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy, we approach chronic illness through an identity-informed, relational, and deeply embodied lens.
Your diagnosis is only one part of your story.
We are equally interested in how illness has affected your sense of self: your relationships, sexuality, confidence, and your future.
This is not therapy that asks you to simply "accept" your diagnosis.
It's therapy that makes space for grief, anger, uncertainty, resilience, adaptation, and the ongoing process of becoming someone new while honoring the person you've always been.
Because healing doesn't always mean returning to the life you had before.
Sometimes it means building a meaningful life with the body you have now.
Virtual therapy that moves with you.
The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy is based in Clifton, NJ and provides secure online therapy for adults throughout New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, Texas, and Florida. The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy offers secure online sessions across multiple states, expanding access to care without the barriers of commutes, waiting rooms, or rigid schedules. Virtual therapy ensures more equitable access — especially for clients who are immunocompromised, managing chronic illness or disability, balancing caregiving, relocating for work, or living between homes.
Meet from wherever feels safest and most supportive — at home, in a private office, or even outdoors on a walk if movement helps regulate overwhelm. The work meets you where you are — literally.
OUR Guiding principles
INTEGRITY
The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy is guided by ethical, evidence-based care and a commitment to honesty, accountability, and the well-being of every client.
COMPASSION
Healing begins where shame and judgment end; this work is grounded in empathy, dignity, and deep respect for your lived experience.
AUTONOMY
Your body, identity, and relationships belong to you, and therapy is a space to explore what feels most authentic — free from pressure or expectation.
INCLUSIVITY
Every identity, body, orientation, and relationship structure is welcome here, and your experience will be met with respect, curiosity, and care.
The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy provides inclusive, queer-affirming sex therapy and identity-focused counseling for adults. Our work is grounded in diversity, pride, and social justice, creating a safe, affirming space for clients across sexual orientations, gender identities, and cultural backgrounds.
Grounded in purpose and guided by curiosity, this work is shaped by a deep respect for history, a commitment to social justice, and thoughtful care for complex human experiences.
Curious about our logo or the history of the Pride Flag? Learn more about the values that guide our LGBTQ-affirming therapy practice. Read more.
Did you know?
Chronic illness and physical disability are far more common than many people realize, and both can significantly affect sexual health, body image, energy, intimacy, and identity. According to the (https://www.cdc.gov), approximately 6 in 10 adults in the United States live with at least one chronic disease, and 4 in 10 live with two or more chronic conditions. The (https://www.who.int) estimates that over 1.3 billion people globally (about 16% of the world’s population) live with a significant disability.
These conditions can include autoimmune disorders, chronic pain syndromes, neurological conditions, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, mobility impairments, fatigue-related illnesses, and more. While experiences vary widely, research consistently shows that chronic illness and disability can affect sexual functioning through pain, fatigue, medication side effects, hormonal changes, mobility limitations, and shifts in body image or self-concept.
Hormonal and endocrine disorders can significantly affect sexual health, mood, energy, body image, fertility, and intimacy — yet these impacts are often overlooked in both medical and mental health care. Conditions such as thyroid disorders, endometriosis, diabetes, adrenal disorders, low testosterone, menopause-related hormonal changes, and Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (recently renamed PMOS: Polycystic Ovarian Metabolic Syndrome by some researchers and advocacy groups to better reflect its metabolic and systemic nature) can all influence desire, arousal, pain, fatigue, emotional regulation, and body experience.
These conditions are extremely common. According to the (https://www.cdc.gov), more than 38 million Americans live with diabetes, while thyroid disorders affect an estimated 20 million people in the U.S. Endometriosis affects approximately 1 in 10 reproductive-age women globally ((https://www.who.int)), and PCOS/PMOS is estimated to affect between 6–13% of reproductive-age women according to the WHO. Hormonal and metabolic conditions often intersect directly with sexuality, body image, relationships, and identity — especially when symptoms involve pain, weight fluctuation, fatigue, infertility, or changes in sexual functioning.
Sexual health is often under-addressed in medical care for chronically ill and disabled populations, despite being a core part of quality of life. The (https://www.nih.gov) and the (https://www.who.int) both emphasize that sexual wellbeing remains important across all health conditions, yet is frequently overlooked in treatment planning and long-term care.
For many individuals — including those with visible and invisible disabilities — sexuality may shift over time, becoming more relational, adaptive, and context-dependent. Desire, arousal, comfort, and emotional connection may fluctuate with symptoms, energy levels, pain, stress, and changes in body function or independence.
Despite these challenges, many people with chronic illness or disability continue to experience fulfilling sexual and intimate lives, especially when care includes communication, accessibility, trauma-informed support, and permission to redefine what sexuality and intimacy look like in a changing body.
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Chronic illness is extremely common. According to the CDC, about 60% of adults in the U.S. live with at least one chronic disease, and about 40% live with two or more conditions. The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that over 1.3 billion people globally live with significant disability.
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Chronic illness can affect sexual health through fatigue, pain, medication side effects, hormonal changes, reduced mobility, and changes in body image or self-esteem. These factors can influence desire, arousal, comfort, and emotional connection during intimacy.
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Living with illness or disability can change how someone experiences their body — physically, emotionally, and socially. Visible changes, limitations, dependence on medical care, or chronic symptoms can all impact confidence, identity, and sexual self-concept.
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Yes. Fluctuations in libido are common and often connected to energy levels, pain, stress, medication effects, and emotional wellbeing. Desire may become more variable and context-dependent rather than constant.
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Yes. Many people with chronic illness or disability have fulfilling and meaningful sexual and intimate relationships. Sexual expression may need to be adapted, but intimacy can remain deeply satisfying and connected.
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Yes.
Sex therapy can help individuals and couples navigate changes in desire, pain, communication, identity, body image, and intimacy. It can also support adjustment to medical diagnoses and help redefine sexuality in ways that fit the body’s current reality. Therapy can also support improve the behavioral management of chronic illness and disability in general.
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It can. LGBTQ+ individuals may also navigate identity-related embodiment, medical discrimination, lack of affirming providers, and additional relational or gender-affirming considerations alongside chronic illness or disability.
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Endocrine and hormonal disorders can affect sexuality in both physical and emotional ways. Conditions such as thyroid disease, diabetes, endometriosis, PCOS/PMOS, menopause-related hormonal shifts, adrenal disorders, and low testosterone can influence libido, arousal, orgasm, pain during sex, fatigue, body image, mood, and emotional connection. Many people also experience grief, frustration, or identity changes related to fertility, body changes, chronic symptoms, or shifts in how they experience intimacy and embodiment. Because hormonal conditions affect the nervous system, metabolism, energy regulation, and reproductive health, their impact on sexuality and relationships is often much broader than people realize.
Did you know?
Cancer and its treatments — including chemotherapy, radiation, surgery, immunotherapy, and hormonal therapy — can significantly impact sexual health, body image, fertility, identity, and intimacy. These effects can occur across all genders and relationship structures, including people with reproductive cancers such as breast, ovarian, uterine, cervical, prostate, and testicular cancer, as well as non-reproductive cancers that still affect hormonal and sexual functioning.
According to the (https://www.cancer.gov), there are more than 18 million cancer survivors in the United States, and that number continues to grow due to advances in treatment and early detection. Research consistently shows that a large proportion of cancer survivors experience long-term changes in sexual function, body image, and intimacy after treatment. While survival rates continue to improve, many are left navigating ongoing shifts in sexual health, fertility, desire, energy, and emotional connection to the body. Reproductive cancers — including breast, ovarian, uterine, cervical, prostate, and testicular cancer — can directly affect hormones, sexual function, and reproductive capacity, while all cancer types may impact arousal, libido, and embodied sense of self.
The (https://www.cancer.org) reports that cancer treatments can affect sexual health in multiple ways, including reduced libido, erectile changes, vaginal dryness, pain during sex, fatigue, hormonal changes, infertility, and changes in orgasm or arousal. These effects may be temporary or long-term depending on cancer type and treatment approach.
Body image disruption is also common. Surgical changes (such as mastectomy, hysterectomy, prostatectomy, ostomy creation, or scarring), hair loss, weight changes, and hormonal shifts can all impact how individuals experience their bodies and sexuality. Many survivors describe feeling disconnected from their pre-cancer identity, or uncertain about how to re-enter intimacy after treatment.
For reproductive cancers in particular, treatments may directly affect fertility, hormones, and sexual function — adding layers of grief, identity change, and uncertainty about future family-building.
Despite how common these experiences are, sexual health is still under-addressed in oncology care. The (https://my.clevelandclinic.org) and major oncology guidelines emphasize that sexual wellbeing is a core part of survivorship quality of life, yet it is often not routinely discussed in treatment planning or follow-up care.
Sex therapy for cancer survivors supports the emotional, physical, and relational impact of these changes — helping individuals and couples navigate desire, intimacy, communication, grief, body image, and identity after medical trauma.
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Sexual side effects are very common after cancer treatment. Research from the National Cancer Institute (NCI) and American Cancer Society shows that many cancer survivors experience changes in sexual functioning, including libido, arousal, comfort, and satisfaction.
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Common changes include decreased libido, vaginal dryness, erectile changes, pain during sex, fatigue, hormonal shifts, infertility, changes in orgasm, and altered sensation. These effects may result from surgery, chemotherapy, radiation, or hormone-blocking treatments.
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Cancer can significantly impact body image due to surgical changes, scarring, hair loss, weight changes, or removal of reproductive organs or breasts. Many people report feeling disconnected from their body, less confident in intimacy, or uncertain about how to experience sexuality after treatment.
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Yes. Treatments for reproductive and non-reproductive cancers can affect fertility through damage to reproductive organs, hormone suppression, or surgical removal. This can bring grief, identity shifts, and uncertainty around future family-building.
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Sexual health is often overlooked in oncology settings due to time constraints, discomfort discussing sexuality, and a primary focus on survival. However, major cancer organizations recognize sexual wellbeing as a key part of quality of life in survivorship care.
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Yes. Sex therapy can support individuals and couples in navigating changes in desire, intimacy, communication, body image, grief, trauma responses, and identity after cancer treatment. It provides space to rebuild sexual connection at a pace that feels safe and affirming.
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Yes. While many sexual effects overlap, experiences may differ depending on anatomy, hormone therapy, gender identity, relationship structure, and type of cancer. LGBTQ+ individuals may also navigate additional layers of medical invisibility, identity-related concerns, or lack of affirming sexual health care.
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Yes. It is very common for intimacy to feel emotionally, physically, or psychologically different after cancer treatment. Recovery is often non-linear and shaped by both physical healing and emotional adjustment.
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Cancer is very common. In the United States, there are more than 18 million cancer survivors, and millions more people living with active or recent diagnoses, according to the (https://www.cancer.gov). Over a lifetime, about 1 in 2 men and 1 in 3 women will be diagnosed with cancer.
Reproductive cancers are also a significant part of this picture. Breast cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer among women, while prostate cancer is the most common cancer among men. Other reproductive cancers — including ovarian, uterine (endometrial), cervical, and testicular cancers — collectively account for a substantial portion of cancer diagnoses each year, as reported by the (https://www.cancer.org).
These conditions are common enough that sexual health, fertility, and body image changes after cancer treatment are not rare side effects — they are a widespread survivorship issue.
FAQS for Chronic Illness, Cancer, & Reproductive Health Therapy
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Absolutely. Chronic illness, cancer, hormonal conditions, chronic pain, and medical treatments often affect desire, arousal, comfort, body image, and relationships. Therapy helps you navigate these changes with greater understanding and compassion.
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Ambiguous loss is grief related to something that has changed but is not entirely gone. Examples include changes in health, sexual functioning, fertility, identity, independence, or relationships. These losses are often invisible to others but deeply impactful emotionally.
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Yes. We work with individuals navigating conditions such as endometriosis, PCOS, PMDD, diabetes, autoimmune disorders, chronic pain, fibromyalgia, cardiovascular disease, neurological conditions, and other long-term health concerns.
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Yes. Medical treatments often change how people relate to their bodies, sexuality, and identity. Therapy offers space to process grief, reconnect with your body, and explore intimacy after treatment or surgery.
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Very common. Many people experience shame, grief, frustration, or self-blame after illness or medical treatment. These reactions are understandable and deserve care—not judgment.
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Yes. The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy is based in Clifton and offers secure online therapy for adults throughout New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, Florida, and Texas.
Virtual therapy allows clients to access specialized support from the comfort and privacy of their own space while maintaining consistency through busy schedules, transitions, caregiving responsibilities, or health concerns.
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The first step is reaching out for a consultation.
This gives you an opportunity to share what you’ve been experiencing, ask questions about the therapy process, and determine whether working together feels like the right fit.
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At The Center for Identity & Sex Therapy, we recognize that illness affects much more than physical health. We help people navigate the emotional, relational, sexual, and identity-related dimensions of living with a changing body, creating space for healing that honors the whole person—not just the diagnosis.
We WANT you to know:
Change is possible.
Contact
When desire changes or identity shifts, intimacy can feel miles away. Stop navigating that untethered feeling alone.
Through online, AASECT-certified sex therapy, we provide a relational, specialized space for adults facing health, cross-cultural, or life transitions that disrupt sexuality and body image. Let's explore what’s evolving.
Ready to begin?
Fill out the contact form below to schedule your complimentary 15-minute consultation to ensure it’s the right match.